Theme
11:18amJune 30, 2023
a-logical-phallus:
“awheckery:
“latenightcinephile:
“largishcat:
“good-4-her:
“simply dont monday
”
simply don’t tuesday
”
simply don’t wednesday
”
simply don’t thursday
”
simply don’t friday
”

a-logical-phallus:

awheckery:

latenightcinephile:

largishcat:

good-4-her:

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simply dont monday

simply don’t tuesday

simply don’t wednesday

simply don’t thursday

simply don’t friday

11:17amJune 30, 2023

official-fuck:

block-swing-perry:

i-point-out-typos:

block-swing-perry:

ghost-now:

block-swing-perry:

im-currently-killing-you:

block-swing-perry:

clowns-with-mallets:

block-swing-perry:

joke-is-over-bot:

block-swing-perry:

official-piss:

block-swing-perry:

block-swing-perry:

official-shit:

block-swing-perry:

official-fuck:

block-swing-perry:

fuck

you called???

shit not you

ok and???

HOW MANY OF YOU ARE THERE

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don’t do this to me

im here too!

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joke is over

im being hit over the head multiple times with comically large mallets by a bunch of clowns rn

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AHHHHHH YOU’RE KILLING ME

no i am

i am simply a ghost now

no dats me

this post is rapidly spirally out of control

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Spirally

FUCKKKKKKKKKKKK

yes :3

11:16amJune 30, 2023

charlottan:

tomfoolery has surpassed lollygagging as the most popular form of hooliganism

11:16amJune 30, 2023
waynegro77 asked:

Hi Neil !

Sorry if you already answered this but I'd like to ask you where's come from the ideas from the 2nd season: all new from you, or you had notes from Pratchett from the old days?. I ask you this because I'd read you saying (here in tumblr) that all this notes with Terry were used in the "extra" scenes of the 1 season, the not on the book scenes from the tv...

Thank you very much

neil-gaiman:

Terry and I plotted a sequel to Good Omens.

Many ideas from the conversations we had about the sequel – not plot stuff, but character stuff and place stuff – made their way into the first TV series.

The second season isn’t the sequel. It’s something I plotted with the brilliant John Finnemore that allows us to get gracefully from the end of book one to the place that the second novel would have started.

If ever there’s a third TV series that will be the story of the second novel.

10:52amJune 30, 2023

commandtower-solring-go:

livefromtheloam:

calidotgov:

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congratulations piracy

Ad agency: Please don’t steal the King’s potatoes, no matter how easy it is.

Regular people: Wait, the King has easily stolen potatoes? How do I get in on this?

Internet users who have been stealing potatoes for years: We made a machine that picks so many potatoes and also that machine is free. Enjoy!

Ad agency: you wouldn’t steal a movie?

10 year old me with 0 income and no movie: YOU CAN STEAL MOVIES????

11:28pmJune 29, 2023

keldabekush:

keldabekush:

video starts circulating on the holonet filmed by three twi'lek performers howling laughing above the sound of pounding club music over an extremely drunk off-duty clone trooper covered in body glitter exactly recreating the choreography from a very raunchy hit-music video on the center-floor pole and NO ONE can figure out who the hell it is because its so dark and the girls are shaking laughing.

But there’s glitter in the coruscant guard barrack’s shower room and everyone is going INSANE trying to solve this mystery

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1:49pmJune 25, 2023

curioscurio:

curioscurio:

curioscurio:

curioscurio:

Ok I’m gonna try and sculpt Donald Duck without looking at it and bake and paint the result

I’ve decided I’m also going to bake and paint it without looking at him

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Here is what I think he will look like based on how he felt in my hands

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God giving me the free will to create was a mistake

1:40pmJune 25, 2023

artistic-arteries:

karshmallow:

Miles “Who’s Morales?” Morales

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Glad we’re in agreement

1:39pmJune 25, 2023

felixcloud6288:

jv:

felixcloud6288:

felixcloud6288:

felixcloud6288:

felixcloud6288:

carita-hearts:

felixcloud6288:

I’ve survived my first day on Tumblr

Achievements:

  • Don’t shoot! I’m friendly!: Prove you’re not a bot
  • AI dismemberment: Disable algorithm settings
  • Friends?: Gained a mutual
  • I recognize you: Follow someone you know from r/Tumblr
  • MY EYES!: Change the site palette
  • Great Idea: Reblog a post
  • They love me: Have a post reblogged

Oh boy oh boy you’re gonna get a Rare achievement for this one


Containment Breach

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I’ve been inundated with over 120 new followers in the last 5 hours. I haven’t been able to even check if I have any pornbots. I’m tired and need to go to bed. I’ll clean up this mess tomorrow.

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This is cool to look at, though. I’m studying some data-science adjacent fields so things like this are fascinating to me.

I’ve been told I should submit this to world-heritage-posts. Just to make it clear what happened to me, here’s a screenshot of my notifications activity in the last 24 hours.

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For additional context, I’ve only been here 4 days.

At his point, I’ve been here 5 days and this post has 85k+ notes. My notifications have recovered to the point that sometimes they’re empty so I’d say the breach has been recontained and now I just need to deal with the cleanup process.

I figure it might be interesting to show just what this experience has been like.

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This is my notification history over the last week. I joined Tumblr Saturday June 17th, 2023 around 12pm so the actual data starts half way through the chart. My follower count has grown at a roughly equal pace.

Overall, I enjoyed the whole thing once the shock died down. I was just surprised this was the post that would gain any traction at all. I expected the chicken posts would be the first ones to reach triple digits and only several months later. But I’ve enjoyed reading peoples’ reactions and chatting with folks here.

I’ll close out by sharing some other achievements I’ve gotten since:

  • It’s free to give: Like a post
  • It’s great to receive: Have a post be liked
  • This calls for a specialist: Install a third-party app
  • Precautionary measure: Disable email notifications
  • Uh-oh: Have a post reach 100 notes
  • Oh no: Have a post reach 1k notes
  • PLEASE NO!!: Have a post reach 30k notes
  • CONTAINMENT BREACH: Have a post spread across Tumblr
  • Fallout: Have at least three posts reach 500 notes during a containment breach
  • Blessings(?) of the gods: Have a post reblogged by a member of Tumblr staff
  • At this point, it’s all white noise: Open your notifications when it’s at 99+ and receive 99+ notifications in less than a second
  • And blocked: Receive hate mail
  • Also blocked: Receive a creepy DM
  • To the scrapyard with you!: Report a pornbot
  • Shiny scrap: Report a male pornbot
  • Maybe you should have thought ahead: Use the Mass Post Editor to add a tag to 20 posts
  • Next time, proofread before you post: Use the Mass Post Editor to edit a tag on 20 posts
  • Wild creature at the zoo: Find a heritage post using the search engine
  • It’s raining cats and cats!: Receive 30 cat pictures
  • True human experience: Receive a message that makes you feel genuinely loved

And with this, I’m going to call this chapter of the Saga of Containment Breach closed

You are going to have a 100k notes post in your first week here. You are really speedrunning Tumblr.

♩♫♩Guess what happened?

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♩♫♩Guess what happened?

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♩♫♫♩And you know what that means!

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My Tumblr childhood lasted a day and a half.

1:36pmJune 25, 2023

lenacraft:

gomi-chandesu:

pika-memes:

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Roommate went out of town once, asked me to look after her cat.

Night one she comes down meowing at me. I go check her food/water, they’re full. Litter box empty. Make sure my roommate’s door is still open and she’s not locked out of her room or something. I try to pet her and she dodges me, offer her treats and she won’t have it, try playing with her but she won’t play, try just ignoring her and she won’t stop following me around meowing at me.

So I call my roommate, concerned maybe she was sick or in pain and that’s why she was being so insistent despite having all her needs met.

Roommate goes: “OH! She wants you to go to bed. Go upstairs to my room and just sit in my bed with her for a few minutes. She should curl up and get comfortable. Once shes laid down she usually lets me go back to what I’m doing she just can’t seem to go to bed on her own”


Sure enough, I go sit on roommates bed and she just happily jumps up, curls up on the blanket, and purrs herself to sleep.

I like when cats try to give their humans healthy habits.

1:35pmJune 25, 2023

only-tiktoks:

1:34pmJune 25, 2023

magicratfingers:

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how can you tell

1:34pmJune 25, 2023

thestuffedalligator:

The goblin looked at the orc. The orc looked at the goblin. They both looked down at the crumpled shape of the Overlord, His Unholy Majesty, in his obsidian armor.

His final spasms had been mesmerizingly acrobatic. The fall down the steps leading up to his iron throne had pretzelled his body quite impressively, both arms folded behind his back and one leg bent at a jaunty angle.

The goblin looked at the orc. The orc looked at the goblin.

“Shit,” said the goblin.

“Shit,” said the orc.

“We’re likely to get blamed for this,” the goblin said. She walked over to the head of the glittering mangled heap and started pulling the helmet off.

“It’s not our fault,” the orc said. “It’s hard to help someone choking when they wear two-hundred pounds of spiked armor at all times.”

“Yeah, well,” the goblin grunted. The helmet came free, and the bald head of the Overlord bounced on the stone with a hollow, coconut noise. “You know how it is in this bloody country - thieves get their heads cut off so they can’t think about thieving, and all that.” She fished in the Overlord’s mouth with a finger and pulled out the obstructing olive on the end of her claw.

She popped it into her mouth and chewed. “What do you reckon they do for a regicide?” she said.

“We should run,” the orc said. She had started bouncing her leg. “I hear that there’s some places in the Alliance where they just kill you and let you stay dead. That’s got to be nicer than what’ll happen if we stay here.”

The goblin started to nod - and then her gaze fell on the helmet.

It looked like a pineapple designed by a deranged blacksmith. It was all thorns and spikes and hard edges, as though the maker had been very determined to not let pigeons roost on it. The only bits that weren’t solid iron were eyeholes. Nobody had ever seen the Overlord’s face.

She held up the helmet and squinted from it to the orc. One of the thorns had been bent badly in the fall.

Nobody had ever seen the Overlord’s face…

“Right,” she muttered. “Right. Could work - or.”

The orc had a sudden vision of the immediate future. “No,” she said.

“I mean you’re about his height-”

No.”

“It would just be for a-”

Absolutely not.”

Just hear me out,” the goblin said. “Outside of this room are two-thousand men and orcs and goblins who are absolutely gonzo about this man, and there’s a whole country of them outside of the castle, and at any moment someone’s going to walk in that door and see one dead tit in black armor and two unbelievably dead idiots next to him.

Or.“ She tossed the helmet up like a basketball to the orc, who fumbled and tried to find somewhere to hold it that wasn’t a knife’s edge. "We chuck him out the window now, walk out the door in the armor, and ditch the armor as soon as nobody sees us.”

The orc had started bouncing her leg again. “They’ll know something’s up the second I walk out of the room.”

“No worries,” said the goblin. “Leave that to me.”

It had been a very strange year for the Empire.

Change had rolled across the land as slow and inevitable as a glacier. Roads and bridges carved the gray, blasted wildlands, and a number of social reforms had made the country a place where you could be miserable, yes, but miserable in comfort and safety, and that was an improvement.

Barely anyone got boiled alive in molten metal, and even if the disgusted sun never rose to light the Empire, at least you had a roof over your head to protect yourself from the acid rain.

Keep reading

1:22pmJune 25, 2023

obsidiannebula:

fantasyrizzo:

im gonna be real i do think we need to spend more time as a society encouraging adults to play pretend in structured ways bc what i’m getting from a variety of sources is we all like to make fake shit and pretend to be people we are not

No fr adults would be a lot healthier if their need for play was more easily satisfied. Play is a fundamental human need that does not go away when we exit childhood but it’s treated as childish and frivolous. No bitch that’s how we process our experiences and knowledge and practice emotions of all kinds in a safe space!! Learn how to play again!

1:22pmJune 25, 2023

nyxelestia:

tenoko1:

2am-theswifthour:

adultprivilege:

disgusting-enby:

itssammray:

spacemonkeyg78:

thecaboodale:

anxious-barnacle:

queen-of-the-merry-men:

freifraufischer:

inkgut:

missymalice:

“young adult dystopian novels are so unrealistic lmao like they always have some random teenage girl rising up to inspire the world to make change.”

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a hero emerges 

And just like in the novels, grown men and women are going out of their way to destroy her. Support our hero.

And it’s not even like it doesn’t happen regularly.  

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Teenage girls are amazing.

Sometimes they’re not even teenagers

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Reblog every time a girl is discredited/ignored

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Who they are:

Emma Gonzalez

Malala Yousafzai

Ruby Bridges

Greta Thunberg

Mari Copeny

Autumn Peltier

Afreen Khan

Sophie Cruz

Charlottesville Black Students Union

Naomi Wadler

DAPL protestors (names not found)

Ahed Tamimi

This isn’t a coincidence. Revolutions almost always happen when the population of a country is at its youngest and that’s a lot more true nowadays with social media.

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Claudette Colvin was actually the first one to refuse her seat in Montgomery, Alabama to a white passenger. The movement chose to promote Rosa Parks as the figure for that form of protest because Claudette was a pregnant 15-year-old girl.

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Barbara Rose Johns was a 16-year-old who organized a student strike protesting segregated schools. This strike, after gaining support of the NAACP, became a lawsuit that turned into Brown vs. The Board of Education and resulted in the desegregation of U.S schools nationally.

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7th-grader Mary Beth Tinker, disturbed by the Vietnam War, decided to wear an arm band with a peace sign on it in protest. Her school suspended her. Her family filed a suit, Tinker vs. Des Moines, which reached the Supreme Court and ruled in her favor, ensuring that students and teachers maintain their right to free speech while in school.

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Freddie & Truus Oversteegen were sisters who joined a Dutch resistance movement in WWII in their teens. They lured, ambushed, and assassinated Nazis and Dutch collaborators. They also blew up a railway line, transported Jewish refugees to new hiding places, and worked in an emergency hospital. 

Our history books may like to showcase male figures, but behind every movement is a young girl ready to make a change. It was true then, it’s true now, and future generations of teenage girls will go on to inspire progress, whether they’re credited or not.

We were raised on these stories of fighting back against oppression, but then the people who wrote them or read them to us act shocked we turned out ready to fight facism even while being anti-social.

There are many reasons why women’s history is so often elided or erased in our education.

But one of those reasons is that so MANY of the women who made history, did so for reasons that challenged existing structures of power…and usually in accessible, related ways that modern day institutions feared students learning from.